Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Top 5 Valentine's Day Mishaps

With the big day exactly a week away, I'm sure many of you are feeling the burn: sleepless nights, 5000-calorie afternoons, and days where it seems nothing will go right. Stress relief is what the Flower Doctor has ordered, and the prescription is some Valentine's Day Humor. Specifically, Valentine's Day Disaster Stories, because, after all, misery loves company.

So this week, we present our Top 5 Valentine's Day Mishaps, from the most tame to the most horrific. 


5)  Not Very Punny Funny.

 "I complained to my boyfriend of 10 years that I never get flowers so the next year I got a box of assorted "flours." He thought he was funnyI wasn't laughing."
- T.B.

 Lesson Learned: Just....save your puns for another time.  (That goes for everyone, all of the time).


4)  DIY Disasters

Pinterest has inspired hundreds of thousands of individuals to try their hands at something new and creative.  These people tried baking.
 


Lesson Learned: Hey, don't be afraid to think outside the box! But if it's something you've never done before...do a test run. 


3) Love on Fire


According to the Daily Mail, a man in Kent, England wanted to surprise his girlfriend at her apartment with chilled champagne, flower petals, and lit tea candles spelling out her name across the carpeted floor. However, when she arrived home...... 
 Lesson Learned: Fire lights other things on fire. Especially when no one is around to stop it.



2)  My Bloody Valentine

There's not an ounce of romance in this Valentine's Day disaster.   On February 14th, 1929, a delivery of bootleg whiskey was expected at George "Bugs" Moran's headquarters (a longtime, bitter rival to gangster Al Capone).  Instead of a whiskey delivery, "Machine Gun" McGurn and three of his men entered Moran's headquarters, killing seven of his guys.  This was the last confrontation between the rival gangs, and is now known as the "St. Valentine's Day Massacre."
 Lesson Learned: You may feel like a co-worker, family member, or partner is really just asking for it this Valentine's Day.......just don't. It's so messy. 

1) The Original Valentine's Day Disaster 

In the time of Emperor Claudius II (268-270 AD), St. Valentine was a holy priest in Rome. The emperor had banned all marriage and engagements, because he believed they made young men unwilling to join his army. St. Valentine continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret, and paid for his romantic gestures with his head.  
  Lesson Learned: See? Even the very first Valentine's Day was a disaster.


Feel better?

..... No?

How about now?






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